Michael Jackson Memorial.

I really won't saying much about today post because I'm still grieving over MJ. I still play his songs over and over again both in my iTunes and my iPod. Well, I know I never been his so-called #1 fans in the world, but I grew up with his song. I recalled this perfectly. The first CD I ever heard was his, the HIStory.

To tell the truth? MJ Memorial only make it worse. It's such a tearful event, I watched it LIVE through my TV screen and I just can't help to cry whenever I watched it all over again in Youtube.

Queen Latifah eulogizes Michael Jackson and reads Maya Angelou poem dedicated to the King of Pop, "We Had Him"

Mariah Carey & Trey Lorenz singing I'll Be There
"I could barely keep myself from crying. I'm sorry that I wasn't able to pull it together and really do it right,but I was literally choked up when I saw him there in front of me"
- Mariah Carey as stated from her twitter.


Basketball players Kobe Bryant and Earvin "Magic" Johnson eulogize Michael Jackson, recalling how he used to eat KFC with MJ.

Jermaine Jackson singing Smile.

Although a tear may be ever so near,
That's the time you must keep on trying.
Smile, what the use in crying?
You'll find that life is still worthwhile.

- Smile, Michael Jackson

Jennifer Hudson singing Will You Be There?


A weeping Brooke Shields gives an emotional eulogy of her longtime friend Michael Jackson. She called their bond "the most natural and easiest of friendships."


Michael Jackson's brother Jermaine thanks the crowd at the Staples Center for attending the memorial service. Marlon Jackson then gives an emotional eulogy. "Maybe now, Michael, they will leave you alone."


Tearful Usher singing Gone Too Soon.


This bring the most tears, to me especially.

"I just want to say ever since I was born, Daddy has been the best father you could ever imagine... I just wanted to say I love him so much." - Paris Katherine Jackson

closing ceremony of Michael Joseph Jackson Memorial.

don't judge me please.

BUSY

Okay, so maybe the word of the day for me. Well, maybe not just day, but days. I'll have quite a schedule next week regarding the time for the semifinal round rehearsal thingy. I've to go here and there, practice this and that. So, yea, I'll be pretty much tired when I reach home so I just don't have the time to update.

Anyway, I want to share something with you guys today. Hmm.. how to start this? First I would like to say that, I'm kinda offended by my teacher today, ballet teacher. I know she's kind and she is (otherwise she wouldn't give me a present for my birthday) but her words kinda offended me.

So today at class, I'm kinda slow absorbing the new material for the next semifinal round and I messed up at my first dance, so you know - she's angry at my slowness and me being so unfocused. She said things that hurts my feeling. Okay, the "things" she said isn't that bad for some people but I'm just too sensitive, that's all. I don't want you to think bad about her or what. But still, it hurts - for me.

I think in the end, it's all about me. I'm offended because I know what she said is true and I just couldn't accept that. You see... I have a problem with my concentration lately, since last year if I'm not wrong. And why would that be? It's because of my health condition. I have something they called as Epilepsy. It's a neurological disorder (brain disorder), I have this thing since I was a kid.

I have had a medication once when I was a child. I should ate a medicine everyday and attend a therapy session. But as a child, I was stubborn so I stop my medication at my own will and nothing particular happened to me until last year. I have seizures, twice and with that my mom took me to two doctors and again, I have to continue my medication (which I terribly hate).

And again, this medicine that I used in my medication isn't without side effect. It's affected me in a terrible and horrible way - for me. I lost MY CONCENTRATION. I found it really hard to concentrate and my marks just dropped. Really, like all of it. And, I was crushed. I feel like I'm useless. Really, I used to cry so hard when I was alone. Realizing what happened to me isn't nice. It's just heart-breaking.

I used to be a good student with a good memory and concentration, but here I am now. So hard to concentrate and to remember thing. Concentrating and remembering things were easy for me, once. It's the truth. But now? Gosh. Don't ask.

I just want one thing. I just want them to understand my condition. It's already hard for me to deal with this thing and myself. It's still hard for me. So, why can't anyone please... please, don't judge me. Don't say anything that will only hurt my feeling. I'm still trying to overcome all of these things.

I guess that's it, and for information, this is the first time I wrote this thing down.

Before you judge me,
try hard to love me,
Look within your heart then ask,
Have you seen my Childhood?

- Childhood, Michael Jackson

July is in the house!

It's July my fellow peeps and bloggie Okay, maybe you just wondering what's so special about July? Well, actually... it's the combination of good and bad news altogether. So, how shall we start this post today? Good or bad first?

Okay, I'll choose bad. In just two weeks, 15 of July to be exact, I'll be back to school and as you know, school is my personal hell on earth. So yea, it's bad news. And know what? I'm a SENIOR, which I'm happy because I'll be graduating soon but also sucks, because it'll be the busiest year for me (and hardest maybe?)

That's it about the bad parts, now come the good parts. Oh yea, excited, aren't you? Well, the good part is that I'm going to have MY SEMIFINAL ROUND! Oh my God, how exciting is that? ah yes, I haven't told you, I passed the first round of my ballet competition and now I'm one of the semifinalist! The semifinal round will be held in STC (again) in 12 July. So wish me luck again peeps. Really-really need it!

And one more thing about July, well... my crush's birthday is in this month

Anyway, I've been trying to watch some TV series these days, actually, I'm starting with Heroes, but I don't know why, I get kinda bored so I tried and watched Skins. Well, what I can say about this British Teen Drama is that - you really need to be 18++ to watched this (or at least, in the age where you're considered ADULT)

Seriously Skins is so dirty, all about those making out thing, drugs, sexes, foul languages.. it's a serious bad influence if you're still kid (12-16 years old can't watch this drama, in my opinion) but despite all of that things, I still watch this. I think the story is pretty good with all their own problem. I love EFFY STONEM!

And, one more thing, I've been planning to watch "A Very Long Engagement" which is a French movie played by Audrey Tautou and Gaspard Ulliel Anyone ever watched this before? Is it good? Tell me. Here's the trailer and with that I bid you my goodbye.

meaningless babbles.

Okay guys, I know I haven't been updating my blog much these days but don't blame me. I'm so speechless and so bored that I don't know what else to blog so I just having some fun in twitter and tumblr, and meanwhile, I'm still browsing from one fashion blog to another.

Oh, and I've just had my Ballet Competition last Saturday and Ballet Audition last Thursday. I can't say much peeps other than

WISH ME LUCK
It's so damn important to me.

I think that's it for today. Such a meaningless babbles

P.S: These two are my object of desire these days! I'm so in love with these

BumbleBee


Chevy Corvette! Super damn hot

super sickly sweet Shia & Megan

I found this super duper sickly sweet video in Tumblr. It's Shia & Megan, in France, in somekind of show doing Q&A things. The end of the video is so sweet! Oh Gosh~